Today’s free jar is destined to David in Hawaii.
There seems to be a lot of Davids around. Have you noticed? I bet you’ll run into one later today. Be suspicious. Your best bet is to mimic my approach which is to just give him something free, then stand back to watch him as he tries to figure out “why?”. Use that moment to escape.
I’m biased though, I was once nearly killed by a David. He was a childhood friend who appeared innocent enough but had a weird fixation on sling shots. We’d always wander through backwoods trails slinging at targets high in the trees, or I would throw pine-cones and toss them in them in the air for him to pick off. Good times, until the day David brought a gun instead of a slingshot and that’s when my mom got scared, and said, “You’re movin’ with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air.” I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I thought, “Nah, forget it. Yo, holmes to Bel-Air!” I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabbie, “Yo homes smell ya later!” Looked at my kingdom I was finally there, to sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.
